Last updated on March 30th, 2023 at 02:14 am
I get a lot of readers emailing me saying, “I can’t find a therapist I like“. Many folks begin their search for a therapist on websites for health insurance, but they discover that a lot of the information is obsolete and unreliable. Less than one-third of those who get in touch with therapists via their health insurance website are actually given an appointment. It can be a challenge to just figure out where to begin, even in a large metropolis like Atlanta, Philadelphia, or San Francisco, where there are thousands of therapists to pick from.
Why Is It Hard To Find A Good Therapist?
In August, Becky Engels lost her mother, and she was aware that she would require bereavement counseling. Between late September and December, she reached out to contact 30 therapists in the Chicago region where she resides, scrupulously keeping a spreadsheet of all of her interactions.

None would take on a new patient. Even though Engels was prepared to pay several hundred dollars for each therapy session, their waiting lists were typically closed as well. She sobbed while watching the ball drop alone on New Year’s Eve without her mother.
“I live in Chicago, a very large city. There are tons of therapists here,” she remarked. ” I find it kind of amazing that there are so many therapists that are at capacity.”
So why is it hard to find a good therapist?
It turns out that long before the coronavirus epidemic started, it was difficult to find mental health therapy in a large portion of the United States. Especially now, following over two years of continuous stress, turbulence, and sadness, there are a lot more people seeking assistance who are faced with a system that is at or over capacity, its inadequacies for this time becoming glaringly apparent.
It is much tougher to locate specialist care for children or those with lesser means. In rural places where access to healthcare is more limited than in urban and suburban areas, help of any kind is hard to come by. There are even fewer options available to anyone looking for a Black or Latino therapist.
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.Therefore, despite the fact that many of those characteristics have been around for a while, the epidemic has significantly made them worse, according to experts in the field of mental health, individuals seeking therapy, and a variety of statistics.
The American Psychological Association conducted a poll of its members last fall and discovered an increase in new referrals and demand, particularly for disorders related to anxiety, depression, and traumatic experiences. Shockingly, 68 percent of the more than 1,100 psychologists who replied indicated their wait lists were longer than they would be in 2020 and 65 percent claimed they had no space for new patients.
Read: Find reunification therapy near you.
I Can’t Find A Therapist I Like: What Can I Do?
Finding a therapist that you like is extremely important because therapy is a very personal process. You will work with incredibly personal events, experiences, and memories with your therapist. Ensure that sharing is easy, that there is respect between you two, and that you both see room for your own personal development with this counselor.
A friend recently came to me and asked, “I can’t find a therapist I like. What can I do?” What follows is some of the advice that I gave her.
Communicate Honestly
It could take a few tries to find a therapist you like. Your first interactions should be used to verify basic facts about them and to build a more reliable impression of the provider’s professionalism. What to ask a therapist during your first communication is listed below.
In order to build trust and allow the therapeutic relationship to flourish, it is crucial that you can communicate effectively with your therapist. How do you feel after your initial interaction with them? Did it feel natural to you to ask questions? Recall your first discussion with them and assess how you feel about the way your connection is progressing.
Find a Therapist You Can Identify With
For many people, it can also be incredibly beneficial to see a therapist who has experience working with identities that form your existence and the specifics of your concern. Find someone who shares your identity if you identify as LGBTQ, are a person of color (POC), or believe that religion has a big impact on your life. Larger cities, such as Chicago, which ranks among the most diverse cities in the nation, make this quest far more feasible than it would be in other places.
Scrutinize Recommendations
It should be emphasized that just because one person had a wonderful (or terrible) experience with a specific therapist, it does not guarantee that you will as well. Take recommendations, read reviews, and make your own judgments. After all, they’ll be your therapist, so make sure you click with them personally and that you like them.
Read: Find a childhood trauma counselor near you.
Find A Therapist Your Like Online
Many people have turned to self-care in the absence of counseling, including journaling, books about grief, yoga, and online therapy apps that have appeared. Becky thinks a lot of people would benefit from support groups, including those that are provided online. She has found the online therapy options to be quite beneficial.
Readers of this blog know that I am a huge fan of BetterHelp. During and after the pandemic, online therapy with BetterHelp has been filling a huge void in the mental health care space. I’ve witnessed many of my friends and colleagues have positive experiences with online counseling. Perhaps BetterHelp may be the easiest way to find a therapist that you like, in particular, if you live in a more rural area. They have over 20,000 professionals on their platform for you to choose from. Read our full BetterHelp review and give them a try today.
Summary
Therapy can be a fantastic setting for development, healing, and self-improvement. As you look for a new member of your support system, take into account your demands and particular life journey. It’s important that you find a therapist that you like. Fortunately, there are many skilled, seasoned therapists from all over the country in the mental health community on BetterHelp who are prepared to offer support. Finding the ideal therapist for you can be accomplished once you decide to get help.
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